Thursday, June 28, 2012

Moving for Good


People move abroad for lots of reasons – work, love, necessity, choice.  I hadn’t really thought much about it before, but we fall into the last category.   It was Vicki at www.vegemitevix.com who highlighted this difference in a recent interview with me.  Vicki is from New Zealand and writes about her life as an Expat living in the UK.  She’s currently running a series of guest post/interviews from other Expats living in different countries giving their “Moving Stories” – here’s mine Moving Stories - 10 Moving for Good Have a look at the others – it’s interesting all the different reasons for moving and ways of coping as a result.  

We chose to move abroad in search of a better life for our growing family and the decision was not taken lightly.  It’s something we planned for many years and when we moved, we intended the move to be for good.  I wonder if the decision of “Moving for Good” has actually affected how well we have adapted and coped with the move.  Maybe it’s given us an advantage in that we didn’t have any feelings of resentment from the start (as you may have if you’ve moved for work, a partner or because you had to for some reason).  Have we tried harder to make it work?   Does choosing to live in France mean we are more likely to choose to live there forever?  

Over at Windmill Feilds on her Expat Blog Hop, Rosalind is discussing the question “Will you, Could you, Do you want to stay where you are forever?”, so I thought it might be interesting to join in.  

Will I Stay in France forever?
Forever is a long time.  I don’t know if I will stay in France forever, there’s a big world out there and I’ve seen hardly any of it.  For the foreseeable future I’m here.  The children are settled and my youngest is only four, so I’m likely to at least see her through school before making the decision to maybe move on.  But you never know...

Can I stay in France forever?
Yes I think I could stay in France forever.  There are things that frustrate me about living here, but I am generally happy and I think the good things outweigh the bad.  

Do I want to stay in France forever?
No, I don’t think so.  As I said before, there’s so many other countries to explore.  I could see us retiring and having a home in France and a home somewhere hotter where we can go in the winter.  I think it very much depends on where my children settle.  It’s likely that at least some of them will settle in France and then I will probably want to be around to help them out when they need us.  If none of our children settle here then I doubt we would feel the need to have a house here in the future, but who knows....

So, are we more likely to live in France forever because we chose to live here?  Possibly, but I think the answer, for us at least, lies in the fact that we chose to Move Abroad for good, rather than Move to France for good.  France was not our first choice, Greece was and it was only because of schooling difficulties for our children that we changed our mind.  So maybe in our case we should change the questions to Will I, Can I, Do I want to stay abroad forever?  The answer to all those questions is categorically yes....probably!

11 comments:

  1. This is such a loaded question for me. I will probably live in Israel forever but I can't believe that I'll never live in England again. I need two lives so that I can do both.

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    1. I know what you mean, two lives would be good - one's just not enough!

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  2. Thanks for joining in and yes we do have very similar answers. It interesting that you say if the children don't settle you would leave. Makes me wonder are we here for our children... what if? .....

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    1. Yes it is interesting. I think probably we did make the move mainly for the children - to offer them a better life and much of what we do is for them. At the moment it's difficult to imagine life without them and I'm sure where they decide to settle will have an impact on where we settle when we're older. But who knows...

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  3. Thanks for the mention Nikki. The Moving Stories series has been so popular on the blog, and so interesting seeing all the different answers to the same questions. There is a whole world of experience out there. I wonder whether moving because you both chose to, has meant that you can commit more easily and create a new life together. I know it can be very difficult indeed when one partner commits and the other cannot. Vix x

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    1. Thanks for setting up the series and publishing my story. It's such a great idea and interesting to read other peoples views. Yes it must make a difference that it was a joint decision to move and that we come from the same cultural background.

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  4. Hi Nikki I'm Moving Stories 11 - the question is - is moving countries just for young families? When is it time to stop? I've just started up Madameexpat.com to write the expat tales, keep it separate from Lunchbox World, my other hat... So what would you say? Here's the link to my moving story - world of opportunity... http://www.vegemitevix.com/2012/07/moving-stories-11-world-of-opportunity/
    Would love to get your take on this Madame Expat x

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    1. Hi Caroline, just visited your new blog - good luck with that. I had no idea you'd lived in so many countries - it was a very interesting read. xx

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  5. Hi Nikki. I just discovered/followed your blog. I'm an Aussie who adores France and my dream would be to own a place in France to live in maybe for 6 months of the year and come back to Oz for the remainder. My husband and I travel a lot. Am currently on a 8 week holiday in Fiji house sitting for a blogger friend. Awesome.

    Will check out some of those Moving stories.

    Denise

    http://pichetsinparis.blogspot.com

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    1. Hi Denise, welcome and thanks for following. Fuji - that must be amazing :)

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  6. I'd love to live in France for at least a little while. Will have to stick around and read for a while and see if I should go through with it!

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